How to know you have way too much money

Carly Simon finally will reveal who the mysterious subject of her 1972 mega-hit "You're so Vain" is to raise money for a Martha's Vineyard charity, but to only one person for a winning bid of $50,000.

On the NBC "Today Show" on Tuesday, NBC Sports President Dick Ebersol said he had won the bidding at Monday's Possible Dreams Auction to benefit the Community Services of Martha's Vineyard, where Simon makes her home. Ebersol said he would ante up $50,000 to learn Simon's secret but the songstress is requiring him to sign a confidentiality agreement... [Die Puny Humans]

Fifty thousand dollars. Gee, if I had fifty thousand dollars to piss away I'd probably take a trip to Europe. Or maybe wallpaper my house with art.

Of course, I'm not the head of NBC. The head of NBC probably burns hundred dollar bills for kindling. The head of NBC probably has some girl on staff for $50K to pull his dick for him because lord knows he couldn't possibly be bothered to do it himself.

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